senior thesis
It Will Always Be There
The Second Semester Split
“First semester was really when all this happened. Second semester was a different story.”
When we returned to USC in January of 1999, hopes were high for a reunited group. Everyone was ecstatic to see their fellow RHPers. Group meals resumed for a little while. Things seemed back to “normal” after December’s madness. But when classes began, it was obvious that something had changed. Some members of the group wanted to continue with the summer camp atmosphere of first semester, while others decided to buckle down with schoolwork and begin extracurricular activities. It seemed as though neither set of people really understood the other set. One valued fun and a laid-back attitude. The other valued hard work and a “responsible” attitude. While these two ideals are not necessarily mutually exclusive, they can be difficult to reconcile. One group just wanted to have a good time. The other group thought they were “throwing away their freshman year because they can’t focus enough on school to maintain a high enough GPA.”
“Our first semester it didn’t really matter, and second semester you had to settle down some. Yeah, bad stuff has happened, but you have to move on. But I think some people didn’t really know where they were moving on to, so that was really difficult.” The stress of December had turned into a wedge that began to split the RHP family in half. “Everybody fell apart. We weren’t like a big group anymore second semester... We never really fought or anything like that. It was just, people started to fall off each other’s radar.” The big group dinners began to grow smaller as people’s schedules became more full. Movie nights occurred less frequently as people found new forms of entertainment. RHPers still continued to hang out, but in smaller groups. “People kind of found who they were really good friends with and [became more distant] with everybody else.” A few RHPers maintained ties with both groups, but the split was clear.
Besides the discrepancy between social and academic values, “the source of a lot of RHP’s diaspora had to do with relationship stuff.” Brad and Katrina were both “ringleaders” -- Brad of the social contingent, Katrina of the academic contingent. One person called them the “centers of our RHP universe:”
“Everyone who got to know [Brad or Kat] got to know everyone else who knew the other person... So anytime you wanted to go talk to Katrina you would have to go to Brad’s room and then you would have to talk to Brad and everybody else there. And anytime you wanted to talk to Brad you had to go downstairs and find him and you had to talk to Kat and get to know everyone else.”
When Brad and Kat broke up, the emotions involved made it difficult to reconcile the two sides of the group. “Our centers of the universe were divided. You hung out with Brad or you hung out with Kat, but you didn’t do both.” I believe that the stress within the group had the unconscious effect of making RHPers seek out other friends, or spend more time with them. “A lot of people at that point had friends outside of RHP that they started hanging out with.”
Throughout second semester, there was an underlying sense of disappointment over Brad and Katrina’s breakup which, in many ways, represented the breakup of the group. When Brad began dating one of the Resident Advisors, “a lot of people were really unhappy about it.” On one level, it signaled that the “centers of our universe” would not be getting back together. On another level, the RA seemed to be an intruder at the very center of our group since she was the first non-RHPer to try to become part of the core. (Richard and Owen were adopted during the initial formation of the group). As a vulnerable group, many people went on the defensive, but did not want to say anything to Brad about it. Some people simply disliked this particular RA because of her loud and domineering personality, and felt that she was taking advantage of Brad. From his point of view, “it just seemed like people started acting differently.” But because nobody wanted to talk about it, he “couldn’t really figure out why.”
On top of the relationship dramas being played out in Marks Hall, several RHPers became involved with drugs and alcohol. One person “wanted to try out the full range of experiences available in college.” Other group members felt that he “started deteriorating, and nobody knew what to do.” Because he had been such a guiding force in the group, an intense concern, mingled with a feeling of helplessness infected the group. Many people withdrew, refusing to watch what they perceived to be a personal as well as group downward spiral. Those who were involved with drugs knew that it “made some people uncomfortable,” but did not realize the extent of their friends’ concern. An avoidance of conflict led to another silent wedge in the group which only grew wider as the semester passed.
A reality check came midway through the semester when an RHPer who was not part of the social group had a major run-in with the law. A student across the hall from him had called campus security because he had seen stolen lounge furniture through his doorway. Another student claimed to have seen a meth lab through the window. When they “busted” this RHPer, they found not only the stolen furniture, but a large amount of other stolen property, marijuana, and marijuana paraphenalia, “including a digital scale worth a few thousand dollars and loads of altered chemistry equipment.” He was charged with destruction of property, theft, and possession of drugs with intent to sell. This was “really fucked up especially since he got busted half an hour after [three other RHPers] were in his room smoking.” However, because he was under 18, the LAPD did not become involved. USC would have pressed charges, but this student transferred to another school, so they no longer had any jurisdiction.
This shocking turn of events might have brought the group closer together, but it only drove the wedge further in. For the people who were not involved with drugs, it proved how dangerous and destructive drugs could be. For some, this RHPer became the typical smart kid gone bad. Those who did take drugs were relieved that somebody else was busted. Between the two groups, nobody wanted to talk about it. There was enough respect between the two contingents that nobody tried to change their friends’ minds. At the same time, a lack of communication kept both sides in the dark, separated.
Another issue was one of faith. Many of the RHPers who were academically-minded also had very strong Christian beliefs. This enabled them to find meaningful extracurricular activities to participate in, but also alienated the RHPers who did not want to be involved with a church. At the same time, for the non-academically-motivated RHPers, “there was really a feeling of not having anything to hold onto. So it was really difficult for [the Christian RHPers] to look at people with no faith and see that they didn’t have anything to hold onto, while to them it was so obvious.”
All was not lost, though. Throughout the semester, there were attempts at rebuilding the family. We continued the big group dinners whenever we could, went to see a musical or two, and generally tried to support each other.
When the question of housing arose in February, we tried to find ways to live together the next year. Since very few Sophomores are allowed back in the dorms, we considered applying for an RHP floor in a program that allows students to suggest special-interest themes. However, we could not find enough interested RHPers to fill the required 32 spaces (eventually, six RHPers rented a house together).
While several factors combined to divide the group, conscious efforts were made to hold it together. Everyone who spoke of the second semester split was quick to qualify their response with a statement of the group’s continuing unity, even though it had lost much of its intensity. “It wasn’t like people never saw each other or anything like that. We were all still really good friends but it wasn’t the same massive group dynamic that was before, it was like two smaller groups that intermingled more.” This particular type of response, I think, arises from people’s need to believe in the continuity of the group. Even when things were falling apart, essentially, the group was still there, and that was what really mattered. To take any other stance would have negated the group’s original value and brought about a need to start all over again socially. Since the RHP family was a foundation on which many RHPers had built their college lives, such a shift in attitude would have been nearly impossible. It was this need for continuity that managed to keep the group from completely self-destructing.